Here are some of the lecturers we've had this year and the subjects they teach:
And the boss of the section:
Important information about lecturers:
Stephen teaches us Networked Multimedia. There is a large section within this topic dedicated to creating Web Pages. Most of us are really keen on this subject.
During the day Stephen is a lecturer, but at night he is involved with a dance troupe called 'Night Stever', who dance to the music of Abba and various other 70s icons.
The Night Stevers are a highly paid group of individuals dedicated to the lost art of making a twat of yourself on the dance floor. Sadly I have been on the waiting list to join this troupe for two years now, to no avail. I live in hope.
Jim is our lecturer for both Project Management and Authorware, and is also our Class Tutor. This means that we can go to him for all our problems - not that we would have any of those.
By night, Jim is a party animal, thinking nothing of changing his shirt up to two times per evening into an even more spangly one than the last. He is a smoker, a joker, and a midnight talker, whilst taking his lovin' on the run. His blonde hair is his finest asset, flowing out behind him when he is out on his motor bike.
Lorraine is very new to the college and is so far very quiet, but we'll soon put a stop to that. In her old job, she used to single-handedly design commercial aeroplanes, but needed a break in her career so has opted to work at Ayr College.
Lorraine flies the aeroplanes she has designed in her spare time, and one day she hopes to advance from papier-mache to the real thing! Only kidding Lorraine.
Alan is the boss, technically speaking, if you can manage to cut through all the red tape. Which incidentally no-one has yet - the last person to try is missing presumed bored to death.
Anyway, we can take our departmental problems to Alan, or we could if we had any. Cos obviously we wouldn't have any - the place runs as smooth as Alan's forehead! Only kidding, Alan always has time for us students - he's very tolerant.
At the weekends Alan goes by the name of Salvador and enjoys eating pizzas with the other turtles. He is a martial arts expert and intimately familiar with the New York sewage system.
Lecturers are employed by the college on their golfing ability first and foremost, and then their teaching genius. Coincidentally, the word on the street is that their teaching skills far outweigh those held by lecturers at other colleges. This is fortunate for us students.